Blue Pieces

If you spend a lot of time driving around this country you see a lot of things – interesting things. All too often these things rise up quickly and then fade in the distance – momentary glimpses – lost in the blur of landscape at 55mph. Now and then I would stop. I stopped at the shrine of charred rubble that was the Flaming Star Lounge. Apparently it had gone super nova, and in that last, glorious burst of razzle-dazzle, gave all that was left to give. Alas, no more Pabst, no more peeling out in the gravel parking lot, no more jukebox, no more Texas two step. Yes, the Flaming Star had fallen, as Lucifer fell – in flame. I breathed in the heavy air, embraced the silence, and determined to insure that the Flaming Star Lounge live on. Click.

Photo taken with KODAK Instant Camera, ca 1985

“I will be there with bells on.” I have not been keeping up with my exercise routine and have backslid into my former slovenly lifestyle. My goal of 180 is now at least 10 pounds further away. I have run only once in weeks. It is going to be awful today. But still, I think I will be all right – after all – it only lasts a half hour. Jeff and Tom will be running, and for the first time in years, Marie will be spectating only.

Me and my boy after the race. I made a PR by 33 secs, finishing in 27:47!

Stayed up late on a school night. Who do I think I am – some kind of college kid?

Celine art the door, Ha Ha

Best to not take the thought farther. Tomorrow (today) is another day.

We were driving on Ridge Road or some long, retail strip. It was late at night. It was kind of bad weather. We passed a mattress store. The place was lit up like a night game – it had huge windows – nothing but windows – to showcase the inventory. Inside was a field of beds, nothing but beds from end to end, front to back. Up in front, near the center, sitting stock still like a statue – was the lone salesman. Sitting on the bed like a travelling salesman who just checked into a hotel room – lonely, dejected, empty, far from home. There wasn’t another soul in the store. I wanted to howl – to let out a long wail in solidarity for this guy – all I could imagine – from my brief glimpse as the car zoomed past him – was that he deserved a break. There he was, trying to make a living. Not a soul in his store. I knew he had to be hurting. I knew business could not be booming, I knew it was not just a fluke – that this was his night, night after night.

The image seared itself into my brain – it was a great moment – not because it was cool, but because it meant something deep and dark and painful. It symbolized our fragile state. It crystallized our need for one another.

I think of that scene, of that salesman, and know that there are many people hoping for better days. But better days or not, we have to make the best of what we’ve got.